Starting Over Stronger: How I Conquered Loss and Found Myself

In February of 2022, I enrolled at Southern New Hampshire for an associate in marketing, which I earned in June of 2023. As the end of that program approached, I decided to continue on in the business program. Today is the conferral date for my Bachelor of Science in Business Administration with a concentration in Entrepreneurship, graduating summa cum laude.

The past three years have been the most challenging of my life. I lost three significant relationships in pretty short order. These were the core relationships of my twenties and thirties. When they say find your tribe, they were my tribe.

And then suddenly they weren’t.

My marriage ended in a particularly spectacular fashion, leaving me to figure out how to financially and emotionally support myself and my kids.

My best friend either couldn’t or wouldn’t offer me any grace while I worked through my depression and PTSD that resulted from the end of my marriage.

And for reasons I still don’t truly understand, my middle sister cut off all communication with me.

All these endings took a significant toll on my mental health. There were nights when the weight of loss threatened to drown me. But, as Captain Jack Sparrow says, “The problem is not the problem; the problem is your attitude about the problem.” So, every day, I consciously chose to have a positive attitude. Because of this, there is no doubt I am stronger today than ever before.

And although I experienced a lot of loss in a short time, there was also joy. My relationship with my oldest sister has been rekindled and is stronger than ever. She has been my rock. My wailing wall. My parents have also been a well of support for me to draw on. And two women I met through work have become two of my truest friends. Beyond this small group, there are countless others whom I know I could call on if needed, and that’s such a comfort.

Over the weekend, I realized that, for the first time in years, I felt normal. The in-between time is over. I have conquered the mountain. And I can honestly say I am happy.

While this life I am leading is not what I thought it would be, there are echoes of the before time. I am learning who I am and, maybe more importantly, who I am not. Not many people are given the opportunity to start over, and I am grabbing onto this chance with both hands.

Thank you to everyone who has stuck with me and my kids. I am excited about the future and look forward to sharing it with you.

You are never too old to set a new goal or to dream a new dream.

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